Women are Complicated!!

Ladies, I am about to tell you something that most of us never realize. Something that we don't want to believe because it might mean that the problem is with us. Something so basic and yet so very important that we have trouble accepting it's reality. It is simply this: Guys are easy. No joke. Over the course of this blog, I plan on revealing my secrets to understanding them, getting along with them, and mostly, "getting" them. Let me remind you of a phrase that you've all heard: "Women are so complicated". Yes, yes. We have all thought, at some point in time, that men are as well just as complicated. Not true. Think about this. When the spring thaw comes about and temperatures reach 45 degrees, we all throw our hats and scarves and big bulky sweaters in a box not to be heard from again until November. But once August rolls around and that same 45 degrees returns to us, we're digging out those sweaters and hats and wondering where the warm went. Does that mean that 45 degrees is colder in the fall than it is in the winter. Well, yes. "Hot" and "Cold" are what scholars call "relative terms". So, if men believe that women are complicated, then they must be standing in the summer looking at the approaching fall. That 45 degrees means that I have to hunt down the box of gloves I packed away and stock up on hot chocolate. So what does that mean to us, ladies? Well, it means that we're in the winter looking into the spring, seeing that the 45 degrees the weatherman is predicting will bring out our short sleeves and sandals. But here's where we, as a gender, mess up. It still gets cold at night in March. You may be able to bring out you're tank tops and mini-skirts, but when you go out at night, you're bringing that cardigan. Guys are easy BECAUSE we're complicated. And because we're complicated, we certainly can't expect them to figure us out. They have been pursuing us for so long that it has come to us to turn the tail chasing tables and make things easy for them. I'm going to give you tips, show you tricks, and give you the skills you need to get any guy. A few years ago, a movie staring Will Smith and Kevin James came out in which Will Smith's character believed that any guy could get any woman if he knew what he was doing. The problem was that they didn't know what they were doing. And so it became Will Smith's role to help those men get the women they were in love with. I am going to do the same for you, only, it won't be as difficult as it was for Kevin James. Why is that? Well, GUYS ARE EASY!! I can help any woman. Have you always been too shy to talk to guys? Do guys always take advantage of you? Have you been spending time with all the Mr. Right Now's only to have Mr. Right elude you? Well, here's your chance to make a change. I'm going to help you all, regardless of what kind of girl you are. Just stay tuned, be patient, and together, we will conquer this thing we call the male species.